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Parents controlling my coaching

I coach two teams and I am always prepared, focused and structured. One team is running beautifully but I am having difficulties with parents trying to run and control my division 1 under 15's team. I feel like the girls just dont have faith in my coaching abilities what can I do to restore the faith in the girls and stop letting parents run all over me. It's insane. Ive never had this problem before. I come to training and games prepared so Im not sure what else to do, its quite upsetting.

It could be that the parents played netball themselves and are super competitive.  This is very common.  Perhaps try telling a white lie by taking them aside and out of earshot of their girls. (set the girls off doing some drills at the far end of the court) Tell the parents that you have started to have quite a few of the girls telling you that they are getting very intimidated by some of the parents and that they have asked if perhaps the parents could drop the girls off and come back at the end of the session. You are not obliged to give names!  Tell the parents as a group, that the girls' feelings are PARAMOUNT and as a coach, you have to abide by your Governing Body's attitude to girls who are uncomfortable,   Try it out for a couple of weeks and see if this helps.  Let them know that they are always welcome to the matches as you cannot ban them from those!  I hope that maybe this might help.  Deborah

Hi Susan,

Unfortunately you can't please all parents - I had one problem with a parent and approached her after training as she was giving me some grief so I  said that I had given up my time for training and saturday morning's and could I suggest that if she is not happy with the situation that next year she volunteers to do the roles of team manager and coach.    It may also be worth approaching the sports teacher and principal with your concerns and any decent sports teacher and principal will take it on board that you are volunteering your time and hopefully they will back you up.  Deborah also made a great suggestion with the girls being intimidated.

Hope this helps

I had the same problem so i explained to the parents that cheering for the girls with positive comments was fine but telling them what they should be doing was confusing the girls which in turn was contributing to their skill level dropping. I asked them to give me 3 weeks without comments and if after 3 weeks  they could not see any improvement then they could approach me with the ideas that they may have. It worked a treat and not only did the girls improve because of less confusion but from the wonderful positive cheering from the crowd.  

I had exactly the same problem with my year seven girls last year.   After a number of parents took it on themselves to coach the girls at half time and in doing so, confused them - I sent an email to all parents explaining that there can only be one coach.    I asked them to give me any ideas for coaching they may have but to leave the coaching to me.    The next week - they were fine and seemed happy to have had the rules laid our for them.    This year, I did the same thing - and once the message had been given assertively but gently - they seem to get it.     You have the odd parents who breaks through - but on the whole they behave in appropriate and positive ways now.

the club i am now coaching for was a bit worried that some of the parent of the girls may not like the way i coach so one of the senior club members spoke to girls parents and told them to let me go and do my own thing! And this has worked wonders for me. And now this group of girls have learnt so much and with every week they are improving and the parents are seeing it:) so maybe get a senior club member to have a talk to the parents asking them to back off and let you do your thing and then the parents will get to see how much their daughters have improved!

Venessa's idea of getting a senior club member to talk to the parents is very good. We have had a few issues with certain parents at our club and we issued a warning to all parents and supporters, stressing that coaches are volunteers and they were expected to support ALL volunteers and supplied a copy of the Code of Conduct etc. A senior committee member spoke individually to some of the parents too. We haven't had a problem since - hopefully you get it sorted out soon.

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